Talking to teens about sex isn’t easy, which is why many parents avoid the subject altogether. However, experts say that informing children about sex is an important part of their health education.

Parents must be prepared to help their teens with emerging sexual issues, says Nicole Caldwell, Ph.D, a psychologist on staff at Children’s Medical Center at Dallas. Otherwise, their teens could be risking early pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases and emotional turmoil.

“The key thing for parents to remember is that your discussions with your teenager won’t happen in a vacuum. They will be a natural outgrowth of your overall relationship. So it is important to build an open, trusting relationship while children are still young,” Caldwell says.

Studies show that about 55 percent of America’s teenagers have experienced sexual intercourse by age 17. Some reasons teens give for having sex include: peer pressure, lack of understanding about love, curiosity and rebellion. Therefore, it is important for parents to find ways to approach the difficult subject of sex with their teens.

Here are a few suggestions:

• If the child has questions, you want the answers to come from a mature, caring adult, and not from the child’s peers.
  
• Use current events as an icebreaker. “Let’s say you’re watching the news on TV, and a story about teenage pregnancy comes up,” says Dr. Caldwell. “You can use that news story to begin a more personal discussion of sexual issues.”
  
• When talking with their teens, parents should state how they feel. “Most teens are used to lectures and being told what to do. When parents talk about their feelings it helps make their children feel more at ease,” says Dr. Caldwell.
  
• Start with a comfortable subject and then once you have broken the ice, you can gradually move toward more difficult or embarrassing topics. It often helps to begin by sharing an experience you had at their age and ask them what they think or feel about similar situations they have experienced. “This typically facilitates a positive discussion that your teen will be able to understand,” says Dr. Caldwell.
  
• Sort out your own values in advance. Discuss with your teen the pros of postponing sexual activity until marriage, such as eliminating risk of STDs, retaining their self-respect, developing fond memories of past relationships and enjoying adolescence rather than being forced to grow up too soon.
  
• Pediatricians can be an added resource. Giving information in a nonjudgmental way allows teens the best opportunity to make healthy choices.